Wednesday, December 2, 2015

I Love You

I'll never understand why a three word phrase made up of only eight letters can legitimately scare the crap out of someone. But the reality is it often does. People get in relationships and they start to decipher their feelings, and sooner or later they find themselves contemplating telling the person how they really feel. And this simple little phrase is the only one that carries enough impact. Telling someone you love them is a moment of honesty and vulnerability, and it is meant to be special.

When I tell someone I love them I do it because in that moment nothing else in the world matters. I can't think about anything else. My heart is beating so hard it could burst from my chest. My mind is racing so fast and it looks like a street filled with those flashing signs in Vegas. And it is the greatest feeling in the world when those words spill from your lips and you immediately feel relief because you can finally stop keeping it to yourself. But then there is the immediate panic while you sit and wait for them to say it back. And that's fine, that's just how it goes.

But where everything goes wrong is the moment when saying it or not saying it is done in an effort to please other people. When those flashing lights say "What would my friends think?" that is when you have a problem. This idea pretty much goes hand in hand with the "Isn't it a little soon to start dating again?" problem (see my blog about the cookies). The point is it's just not right to make a decision that isn't being made in our own best interest. If we all keep living our lives in an effort to please others, we will be constantly compromising what we want for ourselves. I don't know about you, but that sure doesn't sound like a fun time to me (and I've had quite a few fun times).

The bottom line here is no one knows your feelings better than you do. No one else should have the power to decide whether or not you tell someone you love them. If you honestly feel like that person means that much to you, then you have every right to tell them you love them. Scream it from the rooftop if you so do please. No one has the right to say when it is too early to tell someone you love them and quite frankly it is none of their business. And no matter how long you have been with someone, you should never feel pressured to say it until you are absolutely sure. You have a right to own your feelings and share those feelings as you see fit. So, tell that person you love them or don't tell them. But either way do what makes YOU happy.